I just quit Medium, so there’s that. I still write articles and stories, but I thought it would be more efficient, cohesive, and practical to publish them here.
As for other activities, I suppose they all involve posting on social media. My use of Facebook and Instagram (the only two I’m “active” on) has evolved through time. These days, I mainly just share links to my articles and books or share posts from our businesses. I don’t know why I bother; only a handful of my kith and kin choose to support them. My promotional pursuits leave a lot to be desired, of course. They’re half-pantsed at best, but I just can’t muster the energy to fuss with them.
I do share political and social (causes I’m really invested in) posts on Facebook, but I try not to augment them with my 2 cents, or when I do, I keep things succinct. I used to add paragraphs of my own thoughts, so long that you’d think I was writing an op-ed piece. I soon noticed that a) I sometimes spent 30 minutes crafting them, when b) nobody bothered to read them, but when they did get read, they ended up simply adding murmurs in an echo chamber, so it’s, in effect, preaching to the choir. I decided that I was just wasting my time. Anyway, whatever I shared already bore the message I wanted to impart. Then again, it’s not election season, so that might be a major factor in my diminished effort.
On Instagram, where I used to participate in follow trains and engagement groups (I was doing bookstagram and petstagram), I now essentially just save posts that I find informative and helpful, and repost+story calls for rescue/foster/adoption for animals that are at risk.
I’ve actually had episodes of skipping social media for long intervals (that’s probably also why this blog gets abandoned for months at a time). I’ve always been a bit anti-social, prone to indulging the urge to avoid interactions and hide out from society. I suppose that translates to the online world as well.
I’ve never had FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out). I don’t really care about trends, and I’m perfectly okay being stuck in an imagined pocket of my preferred time period. I may be a busybody, but that’s because I enjoy stories. Being a gossip is different from being au courant. (I say that as though that was a good thing, haha.) I have no nose for whatever is hip and happening. I don’t need to be in the thick of pop culture, though.
When the term “JOMO” (Joy Of Missing Out) surfaced, I found the concept perfectly relatable. I do miss out on many things, and I’m okay with that. For instance, I miss out on today’s music since I’m perfectly happy listening to the ones I already love (they’re all from the last three decades of the last millennium). There are many things that people are fine missing out on.
While I don’t judge those who are all about experiencing everything – people are diverse after all – I do recommend JOMO to those who want to ease whatever pressure they may be feeling to follow trends and conform to societal expectations. I just want to point out the obvious that it’s not the end of the world to miss out on things if they’re actually inconsequential. In fact, the following are some that might actually be worth it.
- Social media – If it’s causing a lot of pressure or obligation, then maybe it’s better to do without. If you find yourself feeling envious or worthless, comparing yourself to what others are doing with their lives, then you should definitely stay away. If you prefer to mind your own business and keep others out of yours, then why even bother?
- Relentless productivity – It’s good to be productive, but if you’re of the mindset or culture that says you should be “on” all the time, that any time not spent working, learning, or enriching yourself in some way is a waste, then things have gone toxic. There should be balance in everything.
- Wide social net – Some people are just born with a gift for connection, and I’m not about to begrudge their popularity and social chops. The problem is that others who aren’t as socially gifted feel that they should make the effort to have many friends, too. If it doesn’t come naturally to you, don’t force it. You’ll better appreciate and cherish the real connections you do make if you’re not concerned about how popular you are.
- Nights out – I’m actually conflicted about this. Back in the day, our homes typically didn’t offer much entertainment beyond the TV, radio, books, and the landline (I used to spend hours gabbing away on the phone with my friends), so we were more compelled to go out to find amusement. I was true to myself, though, and acknowledged that my idea of a good time was reading with many snacks. I’d recommend staying in today as well, but I feel like GenZ is generally more inclined to be homebodies (thanks to the Internet), and Millennials are getting to the age when they’d choose the comfort of home over going out, so it may be unnecessary.
- The latest anything – I’m not going to step on any soapbox and preach about consumerism and materialism. I’m just going to issue a gentle reminder that we don’t have to buy stuff we don’t need or replace something that already more than adequately meets a need. We shouldn’t allow companies to manipulate us into spending. As a rule, I buy preloved when I can and use something until it begs to be replaced. So maybe I did get a little preachy. 😀
- Competition/comparison – I know many won’t agree. Competition can be healthy – if you consciously keep your mindset wholesome and, perhaps, not take it too seriously. It’s so easy, however, to believe that you have to be better than somebody to be worthwhile and feel good about yourself. I personally love playing games, but even when it’s just a board game, I can feel myself getting angry and frustrated or smug and arrogant. I may also temporarily harbor ill feelings toward my opponents. The only ones spared are my children, whose triumph I’ll always want even in a game of Uno.
- Constant entertainment – Some entertainment is good, but it’s also nice to be bored and feel challenged to amuse yourself. I do believe that boredom leads to creativity or fun discoveries (maybe also mischief, but if it’s clean or, at the very least, doesn’t endanger anybody, offend morality, or break the law, it should be okay?).
- The extraordinary – It would be awesome to encounter extraordinary things. Still, if we’re always searching for incredible experiences, we tend to miss out on the beauty of the mundane and trivial. There may be a juxtaposition in those terms, but wouldn’t it be infinitely better if you could discern magic and miracles in things normally taken for granted? I mean, how boring would you be if nothing but the exceptional impresses you?
Are there other things you think are okay to forgo? Please share!
This Small Life 